Sunday, April 27, 2008

Thank You, Di Mi

"Bye Bye Mummy...Good night!!!"

I would always say this to my Mom before leaving her shop at night back to the house. I was still very small then, chubby and round - and my Dad would make sure that I was comfortable and safe behind him before making our way back to the house on his motorcycle.

Mom and Dad never stay at home for the night lest the shop of being looted. They sleep there while leaving me and my bro ourselves at night in our big but empty house, familiar with the smell of rat poop and dust until my aunt and my cousins shifted in together. My grandma used to say that the house looked like a haunted mansion until the day she lied in her coffin, and most of the time it was unlit and quiet with overgrown grass sprouting everywhere. After dropping me off and seeing me safely behind the brown gates, Dad would wave to me while I yelled loudly despite it was already late at night approaching 12:

"Bye bye, Daddy - GOOD NIGHT!!!"

My Dad is partially deaf, fearing that he could not hear me, I would yell until he nodded his head in response and sped off into the dark with only a bright red light tailing behind him. Over the years, I spent more time at home after school and seeing them less while talking to them more over the phone. And shortly after that, I call them 'Mi' and 'Di'.

* * *

"Bye bye Mummy Daddy...thank you so much, good night!!!" I literally yelled beside my Mom's ear. It's been a long time since I have said that in a very childlish way and I have always loved to see them smile with their eyes slanted slightly in a very beautiful manner - it never fails to warm my heart and elevate my soul. This time, two bright red lights tailing behind the van that they were in.

Braving the rain and the traffic, they travelled a few extra miles after seeing off a friend for business purpose just to ensure that their youngest son's food supply is well maintained. And what's more, their son is having his exam now - that gave them more reasons to drop by to see if he's doing well and eating good. With them, big pile of food greeted my sight - a bit exaggerated and lavish for a student, but all in the hope and eyes of two parents that it would suffice their youngest son's huge carnivorous appetite.

See the drumstick...?!!!

I have to admit that my Mom fares the poorest among her sisters when comes to culinary skill - she's best suited for the living hall like a Chinese idiom says which during the old time Chinese custom expects the lady to know cooking and other domestic skills to serve her husband better after his arduous day of work and to attend her children with good care. Besides marinating some chicken and processed meat, she's great in cooking instant noodles - and she advanced to fried rice. Full stop.

Ok ok ok - I am not doing any justice to her. I have to admit also that she's very creative and innovative - just that certain meals ended up in disasters, but mostly came with packages of surprise that you could never see in any menus in restaurants worldwide. Luckily her husband is tolerant all this while - but their youngest son shamelessly tell everyone from friends to relatives when asked that his Mom was numero uno when it comes to instant noodle before he could discover that she does fairly good in fried rice too, and it was because of all these 'sucky' food that he grew up to become a fine man of his own senses. Even their eldest son had no guts to tell people that!

Though it tasted bland, I could visualise the effort and time she purposely took to boil the rice and fried it well to ensure that each grain was coated with egg to perfection. While allowing my tastebud and teeth to do the work, I remembered the time when both of my parents had to have the rotan next to them during meal times so that I finished everything on the plate, not to play with food, good table manners and not to turn my head to the direction of the idiot box while the rest of the adults could do so while chomping down their food - it's so bloody unfair, I know. Oh yeah, the fried rice tasted love too.

Before making back their long journey back to Kajang, Mom told me that Dad purposely left his chicken drumstick for me and it was together with the pile of food. My heart honestly went Awww...that is so sweet - heck, I know it sounds a bit gay but that's fatherly love.

I confess that I am not those regular bloggers who enjoy blogging about their lavish life and posting up pictures of food with good presentation and followed by the signboard of some kind of expensive restaurants they have been, not to mention their laughters and send-me-up-the-wall-freaking smiles with the this-lime-is-torturing-my-tastebuds eyelids closed when placing some food into their mouth without even chewing them in the first place. But this time, I think, this is the type of food that I rather blogged about; and certainly I am sure the food above tastes very much better than theirs.

Off they went back to Kajang, and here I am telling ya'all about this. I guess at least this is what I can do for the moment, because saying 'thank you' to them verbally can never be enough - and my heart wish to tell the whole world about it. I do certainly feel like a kid now, but Physical Chemistry is forcing me to grow up to 20 by noon tomorrow. But in their eyes, I will always be that small kid that they have known best all these while.

Good night Mummy Daddy, see you next week. I love you. And tell Snoopy, Grace and Bushy sorry that the bones go into the dustbin, couldn't bring it back for them. Oh yeah, and sorry too - I went to play pool just now when I was supposed to be studying for my exam tomorrow - hehehehe.


Friday, April 25, 2008

In preparation for Maths paper later


Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Practice for English Paper Tomorrow

012-016/019 Jalan Kopunye,
Taman Perindustrian Minewan,
11235 Selangor Darul Pengsan,

To : Ms. Kong Loh Soh, Administration Department
From : Mr. Ai Ken Not, Supervisor, Production Department
Subject : Recommendation on Production and Efficiency Boost Plan
Date : 22nd April 8002

Being disatisfied with the low yield and production rate of the workers, the president of this corporation urged the Production Department to formulate a new plan to tackle this problem. Prior to his transfer to the asylum, he expressed his wish to have Ms. Kong to personally oversee and materialise his desperate attempt to steer the company from the inevitable likelihood of bancruptcy back onto the right track. Hence, this report should provide you with the sufficient insight and information to cast this whole corporation with the final beacon of hope of the president.

A specially set up committee to assess the situation before laying down the framework has discovered that huge number of workers are late to work everyday, reducing their production rate at a significant rate. A check on their punchcards revealed that majority of them are Malaysians living within the range of 2km from the workplace - oh well, Malaysians... . Hence to overcome this matter, the HR manager is only to employ workers who best are imsoniac. Alternatives should be workers who are single and possess their own tents or sleeping bags, applications from Spartans will be prioritised. The corporation should also annex part of the premises as campgrounds inclusive of kitchens and open bathrooms for the workers during the nights. The policy should be altered as well to make it compulsary for the workers to camp during weeknights, and pyjamas with Hello Kitty motifs are strictly prohibited. This, we believe, will surely reduce the number of workers late to work.

Besides that, the committee has also found a peculiar trait among all - yes, I mean all - workers during 5 minutes before noon and 5pm, where they will be in a ritual trance of chanting and agitated dancing; apparently worshipping the God JamDinding. Few are reported to exhibit their faithful devotion near all exits. On top of that, 11 out of 10 workers possess severe 4S (Sleeping Standing Straight Syndrome) - symptoms are heavily demonstrated particularly around 1 to 3pm - while operating heavy machineries. A medical treatment is recommended. Dubbed as 'Operation Frankenstein', the treatment will consist of implanting two semi-metal electrodes with antennae in both the brain hemispheres of the workers, followed by Imperio counselling with Dr He-Should-Not-Be-Named. The electrodes function to sent kilovolts of rejuvenating electricity to the workers when their brainwave are monitored to be below Einstein's recorded brainwave.

Lastly, all newly employed worker would be placed under a probation period of at least one week in the House of Wax before being confirmed of their employment by the corporation. Workers who survive below expectation would dine in hell be terminated by T-300 under the chemical shed behind the premise together with the head-pierced Paris Hilton. Apart from that, workers who are found to be exceptionally potential in waxing superiors' shoes would be instantaneously transferred to Housekeeping, Toilet Hygiene and Janitorial Department to further exploit their talents. Promotions would be given on the basis of ark building - manual Ark Building for Dummies will be given to interested applicants free of charge, courtesy of G Himself. Applications from X-Men should be strongly denied as it would lead to frequent interventions of Magneto that will render the machineries in the corporation to be condemned easily and beyond repair.

We hope that you will find the recommendations in this report informative and of expectation. Please do not hesitate to contact me on my hotline 1300-ESCORT-FOR-HIRE should you have any queries, I will be extremely overjoyed to assist you in anyway possible.

Thank you.

CC: Brangelina, Vietnamese Adoption and Employment Agency


Monday, April 07, 2008

Thinning Youth

This is what the previous Saturday felt like to me:

Jimmy Eat World - Work

If you only once would let me
Only just one time
Then be happy with the consequence
With whatever's gonna happen tonight

Don't think we're not serious
When's it ever not
The love we make is give and it's take
I'm game to play along

All I can say
I shouldn't say
Can we take a ride?
Get out of this place
While we still have time

All the best DJs are saving
Their slowest song for last
When the dance is through
Its me and you
Come on would it really be so bad

The things we think might be the same
But I won't fight for more
Its just not me to wear it on my sleeve
Count on that for sure

All I can say
I shouldn't say
Can we take a ride?
Get out of this place
While we still have time
You want to take a ride?
Get out of this place
While we still have time
Yeah - We still have time

Can't say I was never wrong
But some blame rests on you
Work and play they're never okay
To mix the way we do

All I can say
I shouldn't say
Can we take a ride?
Get out of this place
While we still have time
You want to take a ride?
Get out of this place
While we still have time
We still have time

crono will be taking a break to focus much more on his coming examinations due to his frivolous academic conduct at the expense of his precious sleeping time and grades in his pursuit of sanity and satisfaction by the lines of his beliefs and so-called idealistic principles to ensure his life and mind are in harmonious integrity that is devoid of the superficial shell protected by a veneer of vanity casted over every single zombiefied member of the society - if his feeble determination prevails the temptations of the contemporary but temporary deceitful distractions around him that toy with his senses to collapse his mental barricade to reveal the fragile and certainly slimy mass of goo and neurons that can be obliterated in a blender with ease.

crono would like to extend his deepest gratitude to paulinahhh, nathaniel-tien-kwan-kira-semi-celestial-whatever-tong-weirdo, chia sissy cc, and the kononnya-sangat-sedap stephalicious for a wonderfully insane Saturday that he will never forget.