Smile that disregards whether you're a scout, a Muslim, a Malaysian or a no-no extraordinary.

I saw that she is a scout from the back of her shirt. But it wasn't easy registering the fact by the look of her face. Morose. Black. Void.

When she left the car, her brother - also a very good friend of mine - confirmed the truth. And it's not her thing to smile he added. But to be fair to her, she has dark skin complexion for a Chinese. My brains were fazed - a scout, who doesn't smile frequently? Awkward sure it is if you were to ask me.

What does smiling got to do with scouting (and guiding)? Good question my friend. 'We scouts uphold and appreciate smiles a lot.' And it turned out to rhyme like Stephen Hawking has just said that the world is flat by the sound of his smirks.

But the focus it not really about the sister that prompts the birth of this note. At the end, you will see that it is not really about scouting too.

It is just that scouting and smiling are both things that are knitted so closely and delicately, like the threads in a piece of cloth, it forms one of the building blocks for the movement that somewhat makes us scouts so benevolent and believeable in ourselves, our abilities and in the community. And in the vision of Lord Baden Powell, its founder and ours, scouting exists to help the soul of every man in every way and time that we can.

We believe in the virtues of helping regardless of the outcome and reward because we have firm faith in what humanity should be and will be. It does not matter whether it is a school uniformed body or an ex-scout leader like myself and some. Being a scout actually means bigger - way whole lot bigger than this. We define ourselves by actions and principles - not on skin colours, the badges, the ranks nor the uniform we don.

Gandhi is a scout by definition. Thus, every scout can (I won't say 'is') be Gandhi, or Buddha. Every man who fight for the rights and lives of others, every selfless souls out there is a scout. A Mother Theresa. A St. John Ambulance cadet. Or even a our beloved Yasmin Ahmad. Soon when maturity begets humanity, one will realise that all these labels and boundaries are meaningless and trivial.

So, how does help begin? By smiling. We never know to whom it is intended for, but the good-feeling curve is surely a powerful ray stronger than the sun - and it's contagious too. It's never specific, but if it can brighten the day of even only a dampened soul, it serves its job well and can definitely be greater with confidence.

With our principles, it's hard for a scout to forsake smiling. Though we can't be smiling all the time and have facial cramps thereafter, but at least we won't return home pulling a long face or being in the public instiling hostility in the environment. So let this be a call for every scout in heart to continue smiling when you thought the good old scouting days have long gone.

The other half of my smiling lesson comes from being a Malaysian, especially the fact that I cherish most is that my parents made the decision to have me educated in a national (so-called Malay) school. I have nothing to lose not knowing my mothertongue well for the smile it taught me to see the beauty of living in this country that is overruled with diversity. Maybe our politicians can learn a thing or two from there by kicking them back to their primary school.

That's why smiling is the first step - and it is sometimes just all that we need. It binds us all no matter who we are. Whether you are a scout, the Red Crescent, you are an Indian, a Malaysian; by smiling you will realise you will be all in what you believe and dream can be - you are everyone and everything.

"A Scout smiles and whistles under all circumstances." _Robert Baden-Powell

The Rape of The Chinese Dream

Fireworks. Colours. People. Unity. Light. Pride. A celebration of humanity. And a sea of praises.

China celebrated her moment almost 2 months ago when the ex-communist nation hosted the 2008 Summer Olympic Games. While it was aimed at saving the republic from the Western notion that China is an ugly capitalistic nation with a despised communist past and hellish democracy for her people, the goverment under the lead of Hu Jintao are basked in glory from the opening night to even until now when the most expensive Games ever held wooed the spirit of every man, woman and child on this Earth.

And when most probably now every Chinese are standing on international ground with a much confident posture and the government going through every praise, the so-called Chinese illegal migrants are still in the process of claiming their Olympiad moment. And it is these Chinese people that the success of the 29th Olympic Games owing to.

Unfortunately, instead of receiving their equal share of praises and recognitions from the government and countrymen of the republic, these people are facing intimidation, abuse and discrimination from them. Due to the industrial boom and development that focus heavily in major cities like Beijing, many rural folks came in like bee swarms to these still-scaling concrete jungles to get a share of the pie that country is profiting.

With lots of opportunities there from job to education, and better infrastructures and lifestyle, the dreams of these countryside folks crashed when the government realised their capitalistic policy could not accomodate these parties in the urban cities. Deciding they are more of an eyesore among the urbanites with modern skyscrappers decorating the background, the Chinese government initiated a new policy that disallow them to enjoy social, health and other benefits unlike their city counterpart. To drive them away and to discourage more influx of non-cities dwellers, this policy bring rise to degoratory terms like 'illegal migrants' and 'second-class citizens' in the vocabulary bank of the city folks.

These rural migrants are trapped in big cities unwelcome to them, some with families. With corruption as ubiquitous as the Chinese themselves on their soil, accesses to health, social and government services are often hefty as bills intineraries include electrical appliances and 'extra service charge'. And to survive, they have no choice but to be employed as cheap labours no different than slaves since going home back to the meadow fields and hills to work might even prove to be the worst due the government's inability and lack of fund to develop the rural areas. And this might just explain the answer behind the rapid transformation of Beijing for the Games in just 2 years. When the transformation had finished just prior to the Games, the government was looking for crude ways to chuck these people away as fast as possible to save their image from the eye of the world, and after that pretends nothing has happened leaving these people fending for themselves. How ironic!

When we are complaining in Malaysia of interracial discriminations, it is disgusting to know that intraracial discrimination takes place and unlike the Malaysian government, the Chinese government made it public. Bravo! While I admire their courage and honesty, I have to say solving one social issue is not by excluding and exploiting certain parties of the nation when certainly the republic is making tonnes of money at the expense of these poor people while corruption is very rampant. The tax that these people paid like the rest is meant to steer the country away from national woes and paying the very government that abuse them to do their job which is to protect them and setting policies that ensure the wellbeing of the nation and the people in it. Directly, these discriminated ones should be given equal opportunity to enjoy the benefits like the rest are currently taking for granted.

I won't try to compare the similarities of Malaysia and China, fearing that I will end up like RPK, Tan Cheng Hoon and Teresa Kok. But I am sure we are here very much lucky than the Chinese given the fact we have more access to medias, NGOs, funds and especially the rising awareness among Malaysians of all ages and races to champion our cause in achieving equality that we all dream for our children.

However, this portrays the sinister nature of human beings that discrimination can happen anywhere with whoever you are with. Skin colour is just a more distinguishable feature among men, but when all our skins bears the same colour, humans will resort to intangible reasons like status, money or achievement just to separate themselves from the rest. After all, it is our pathetic behaviour that we seek parties that have in common with us, but at the same time, we are trying so hard to differentiate ourselves from the rest. But it is also the more reason that I believe if we are able to change, we Malaysians will be more united as we are the ones that try and know our fight clearly to overcome our differences to be under the genuine wings of a system called 'nation'.

But I can conclude seeing the development of these two countries in general - and also India - that what a close companion of mine said might hold truth and logic to an extent, that countries that forsake human rights develop faster, but broken in the opposing aspect of course i.e. social.

When human right groups blasted the Chinese republic for obvious and blatant human rights violations last month, Hu Jintao's party strongly denied it. So now, what more have you got to say for yourself China? And oh, Malaysia, stop giggling and pointing your finger in their direction - you're next.

Zaid Ibrahim's open letter to PM

29 September 2008

YAB Dato’ Seri Abdullah Badawi
Prime Minister of Malaysia
5th Floor, East Wing
Perdana Putra Building
Putrajaya
Malaysia

Dear Mr Prime Minister

In our proclamation of independence, our first Prime Minister gave voice to the lofty aspirations and dreams of the people of Malaya: that Malaya was founded on the principles of liberty and justice, and the promise that collectively we would always strive to improve the welfare and happiness of its people.

Many years have passed since that momentous occasion and those aspirations and dreams remain true and are as relevant to us today as they were then. This was made possible by a strong grasp of fundamentals in the early period of this nation. The Federal Constitution and the laws made pursuant to it were well founded; they embodied the key elements of a democracy built on the Rule of Law. The Malaysian Judiciary once commanded great respect from Malaysians and was hailed as a beacon for other nations. Our earlier Prime Ministers, Tunku Abdul Rahman, Tun Razak and Tun Hussein Onn were truly leaders of integrity, patriots in their own right and most importantly, men of humility. They believed in and built this nation on the principles and values enunciated in our Constitution.

Even when they had to enact the Internal Security Act (ISA) 1960, they were very cautious and apologetic about it. Tunku stated clearly that the Act was passed to deal with the communist threat. “My cabinet colleagues and I gave a solemn promise to Parliament and the nation that the immense powers given to the Government under the ISA would never be used to stifle legitimate opposition and silent lawful dissent”, was what the Tunku said. Our third Prime Minister Tun Hussein Onn reinforced this position by saying that the ISA was not intended to repress lawful political opposition and democratic activity on the part of the citizenry.

The events of the last three weeks have compelled me to review the way in which the ISA has been used. This exercise has sadly led me to the conclusion that the Government has time and time again failed the people of this country in repeatedly reneging on that solemn promise made by Tunku Abdul Rahman. This has been made possible because the Government and the law have mistakenly allowed the Minister of Home Affairs to detain anyone for whatever reason he thinks fit. This subjective discretion has been abused to further certain political interests.

History is the great teacher and speaks volumes in this regard. Even a cursory examination of the manner in which the ISA has been used almost from its inception would reveal the extent to which its intended purpose has been subjugated to the politics of the day.

Regrettably, Tunku Abdul Rahman himself reneged on his promise. In 1965, his administration detained Burhanuddin Helmi, the truly towering Malay intellectual, a nationalist who happened to be a PAS leader. He was kept in detention until his death in 1969. Helmi was a political opponent and could by no stretch of the imagination be considered to have been involved in the armed rebellion or communism that the ISA was designed to deal with. This detention was an aberration, a regrettable moment where politics had been permitted to trump the rule of law. It unfortunately appears to have set a precedent and many detentions of persons viewed as having been threatening to the incumbent administration followed through the years. Even our literary giant, ‘sasterawan negara’ the late Tan Sri A Samad Ismail was subjected to the ISA in 1976. How could he have been a threat to national security?

I need not remind you of the terrible impact of the 1987 Operasi Lalang. Its spectre haunts the Government as much as it does the peace loving people of this nation, casting a gloom over all of us. There were and still are many unanswered questions about those dark hours when more than a hundred persons were detained for purportedly being threats to national security. Why they were detained has never been made clear to Malaysians. Similarly, no explanation has been forthcoming as to why they were never charged in court. Those detainees included amongst their numbers senior opposition Members of Parliament who are still active in Parliament today. The only thing that is certain about that period was that UMNO was facing a leadership crisis. Isn’t it coincidental that the recent spate of ISA arrests has occurred when UMNO is again having a leadership crisis?

In 2001, Keadilan ‘reformasi’ activists were detained in an exercise that the Federal Court declared was in bad faith and unlawful. The continued detention of those that were not released earlier in the Kamunting detention facility was made possible only by the fact that the ISA had been questionably amended in 1988 to preclude judicial review of the Minister’s order to detain. Malaysians were told that these detainees had been attempting to overthrow the Government via militant means and violent demonstrations. Seven years have gone and yet no evidence in support of this assertion has been presented. Compounding the confusion even further, one of these so-called militants, Ezam Mohamad Noor, recently rejoined UMNO to great fanfare, as a prized catch it would seem.

At around the same time, members of PAS were also detained for purportedly being militant and allegedly having links to international terrorist networks. Those detained included Nik Adli, the son of Tuan Guru Nik Abdul Aziz Nik Mat the Menteri Besar of Kelantan. Malaysians were made a promise by the Government that evidence of the alleged terrorist activities and links of these detainees would be disclosed. To date no such evidence has been produced.

The same formula was used in late 2007 when the HINDRAF 5 were detained. Malaysians were told once again that these individuals were involved in efforts to overthrow the Government and had links with the militant Liberation Tiger of Tamil Eelam of Sri Lanka. To date no concrete evidence have been presented to support this assertion. It would seem therefore that the five were detained for their involvement in efforts that led to a mobilisation of Malaysian Indians to express, through peaceful means, their frustration against the way in which their community had been allowed to be marginalised. This cause has since been recognised as a legitimate one. The HINDRAF demonstration is nothing extraordinary as such assemblies are universally recognised as being a legitimate means of expression.

In the same vein, the grounds advanced in support of the most recent detentions of Tan Hoon Cheng, Teresa Kok and Raja Petra Kamarudin leave much to be desired. The explanation that Tan Hoon Cheng was detained for her own safety was farcical. The suggestion that Teresa Kok had been inciting religious sentiments was unfounded as was evinced by her subsequent release.

As for Raja Petra Kamarudin, the prominent critic of the Government, a perusal of his writings would show that he might have been insulting of the Government and certain individuals within it. However, being critical and insulting could not in any way amount to a threat to national security. If his writings are viewed as being insulting of Islam, Muslims or the Holy Prophet (pbuh), he should instead be charged under the Penal Code and not under the ISA. In any event, he had already been charged for sedition and criminal defamation in respect of some of his statements. He had claimed trial, indicating as such his readiness and ability to defend himself. Justice would best be served by allowing him his day in court more so where, in the minds of the public, the Government is in a position of conflict for having been the target of his strident criticism.

The instances cited above strongly suggest that the Government is undemocratic. It is this perspective that has over the last 25 plus years led to the Government seemingly arbitrarily detaining political opponents, civil society and consumer advocates, writers, businessmen, students, journalists whose crime, if it could be called that, was to have been critical of the Government. How it is these individuals can be perceived as being threats to national security is beyond my comprehension. The self-evident reality is that legitimate dissent was and is quashed through the heavy-handed use of the ISA.

There are those who support and advocate this carte-blanche reading of the ISA. They will seek to persuade you that the interests of the country demand that such power be retained, that Malaysians owe their peace and stability to laws such as the ISA. This overlooks the simple truth that Malaysians of all races cherish peace. We lived together harmoniously for the last 400 years, not because of these laws but in spite of them.

I believe the people of this country are mature and intelligent enough to distinguish actions that constitute a ‘real’ threat to the country from those that threaten political interests. Malaysians have come know that the ISA is used against political opponents and, it would seem, when the leadership is under challenge either from within the ruling party or from external elements.

Malaysians today want to see a Government that is committed to the court process to determine guilt or innocence even for alleged acts of incitement of racial or religious sentiment. They are less willing to believe, as they once did, that a single individual, namely the Minister of Home Affairs, knows best about matters of national security. They value freedom and the protection of civil liberties and this is true of people of other nations too.

Mr Prime Minister, the results of the last General Election are clear indication that the people of Malaysia are demanding a reinstatement of the Rule of Law. I was appointed as your, albeit short-lived, Minister in charge of legal affairs and judicial reform. In that capacity, I came to understand more keenly how many of us want reform, not for the sake of it, but for the extent to which our institutions have been undermined by events and the impact this has had on society.

With your blessing, I attempted to push for reform. High on my list of priorities was a reinstatement of the inherent right of judicial review that could be enabled through a reversion of the key constitutional provision to its form prior to the controversial amendment in 1988. I need not remind you that that constitutional amendment was prompted by the same series of events that led not only to Operasi Lalang but the sacking of the then Lord President and two supreme court justices. Chief amongst my concerns was the way in which the jurisdiction and the power of the Courts to grant remedy against unconstitutional and arbitrary action of the Executive had been removed by Parliament and the extent to which this had permitted an erosion of the civil liberties of Malaysians. It was this constitutional amendment that paved the way for the ouster provision in the ISA that virtually immunises the Minister from judicial review, a provision which exemplifies the injustice the constitutional amendment of 1988 has lent itself.

I also sought to introduce means by which steps could be taken to assist the Judiciary to regain the reputation for independence and competence it once had. Unfortunately, this was viewed as undesirable by some since an independent Judiciary would mean that the Executive would be less ‘influential’.

I attempted to do these things and more because of the realisation that Malaysia’s democratic traditions and the Rule of Law are under siege. Anyway, there is nothing wrong with giving everyone an independent Judiciary and the opportunity to a fair trial. This is consistent with the universal norms of human rights as it is with the tenets of Islam, the religion of the Federation. Unchecked power to detain at the whim of one man is oppressiveness at its highest. Even in Israel, a nation that is perpetually at war, the power to detain is not vested in one man and detention orders require endorsement from a judge.

If there are national security considerations, then these can be approached without jettisoning the safeguards intended to protect individual citizens from being penalised wrongfully. In other jurisdictions involved in armed conflicts, trials are held in camera to allow for judicial scrutiny of evidence considered too sensitive for public disclosure so as to satisfy the ends of justice. If this can be done in these jurisdictions, why not here where the last armed struggle we saw, the very one that precipitated the need for the ISA, came to an end in the 1980s? Any doubts as to the continued relevance of the ISA in its present form should have been put to rest by the recommendation by the National Human Rights Commission (SUHAKAM) that the ISA be repealed and an anti-terror legislation suited to the times enacted in its place. Containing as it did a sunset clause in its original times, the ISA was never intended to be a permanent feature on the Malaysian legal landscape.

Through its continued use in the manner described above and in the face of public sentiment, it is only natural that the ISA has become in the mind of the people an instrument of oppression and the Government is one that lends itself to oppressiveness. Its continued use does not bode well for a society that is struggling to find its place in the global arena. It does not bode well for the democracy that is so vital for us to develop sustainably.

Mr Prime Minister, I remember very clearly what you once said; that if one has the opportunity to do what is good and right for the country, then he must take on the task. I respect you deeply for that and if I were confident that I would have been able to do some good for Malaysia, I would have remained on your team. Sir, you are still the Prime Minister and you still have the opportunity to leave your footprint in Malaysian history. I urge you to do so by repealing the ISA once and for all.

Let us attempt to fulfil that solemn promise made by our beloved first Prime Minister to the people of this country.

Yours sincerely

ZAID IBRAHIM
Kuala Lumpur

Source:

http://thestar.com.my/news/story.asp?file=/2008/9/30/nation/20080930173730&sec=nation

Post-Malaysia Day hangover

I came across a very sincere plea of a Malaysian to his fellow countrymen regarding to keeping our faith unified across races in times of political turmoil like this and making sure this historical day of Malaysia Day goes unforgotten in heart of every man who prides himself with this country. It was posted in Paul's blog and in HarkaoSiumai.

A very well said speech, I would rather call it, with a mix of V's word, I can certainly say that the man behind this cry is a big fan of V for Vendetta like me too. With the recent arrest of 3 figures behinds the oppresive ISA - Raja Petra Kamaruddin, Tan Hoon Cheng (she has been released) and Teresa Kok and other political events that have taken place over the past few months since the wave of 8 March tsunami crashed onto cities and towns nationwide; I find many similarities of the theme and scenes from the movie to the scenarios we are facing here in our homeland.

As much as I wanted to write about Malaysia Day, I am in the midst of preparing for my last paper now, and with so many entries about it by good, sincere writers like Vincent (the one who's behind the plea) - mine would not be of any significance and time worth reading. Remembering that I blogged something similar to it and also with elements from V for Vendetta prior to the political tsunami, I dug back my old entry and decided to post it here again. Enjoy reading!

Cheers, and Happy Belated Malaysia Day from me!

IMAGINING & HOPING

"Remember, remember, remember the 13th of May - interracial clashes, fire and blood. I see of no reasons why this bloody incident should ever be forgotten"

Striking blue and white banners parade trees, lampposts and streets. Entangled to each other, flags of a white moon surrounded by a sea of green looked as if they were being swallowed wholly by the vast blue ocean of those banners. Not far away, light blue flags with vivid red stripes at the edges confining two crescents curved outward were fluttering frantically in the air as the swift wind persevered to shake them off from the fence.

I couldn't help but to notice how similar each places looked alike as they were inundated with the same raves of blue, green, red and white. Repeating faces that could only smile motionlessly appeared everywhere to subdue drivers into believing that each of their smile was genuine and sincere. And the lifted hands were made real like they were meant to outreach to the people who were scrutinising at the posters mindlessly to keep themselves occupied while waiting for their buses to arrive.

I couldn't help but to drown myself in my own imagination while travelling back home that somehow the hectic streets of the capital were resonating with Tchaikovsky's 1812 Overture whilst moment exactly when the clock struck midnight on the 12th May, the Sultan Abdul Samad building that stood majestically in front of Dataran Merdeka which housed the Malaysian High Court were erupting in sudden flashes of bright, colourful light and basked with massive heat together with huge chunks of bricks thrown into every single direction.

I couldn't help but to imagine that my idiot box would go blank for a few seconds at the afternoon only to find a man in a P.Ramlee mask engraved with a wide grin taking responsibility behind the artistic demolition of the old court complex earlier and uttering about the possibilities of democractic freedom and practice of liberal speech, expression and action in this country as promised by our forefathers 50 years ago, while conjuring up the wounds of the May 13 bloodshed to serve as a palpable reminder for this nation the very next day.

I couldn't help but to imagine that every newspaper in this country reported nothing but only the faked and fabricated illusive triumphs of this country, while TVs and radios endlessly spewing chants of Malaysia Boleh every minute to draped over the incompetency and lies that this country had to put up away from the sight of her people and the world.

I couldn't help but to imagine that the sense of renewed hope in the hearts of the people when the familiar mask of P.Ramlee erased the doubts in them towards reclaiming what's right of them from the country and repainted their inner insight that once blackened their beliefs into hatred for each other since the young and the old were not allowed to convey matters that were buried in their mind for so long publicly, which but could only manifest into something far much more sinister and catastrophic if saved too long inside instead.

I couldn't help but to imagine that critical-minded citizens together with resilient bloggers who truly cared for this country, were slowly vanishing from the forefront of the battle where vans of mysterious figures clad in ISA jackets bagged each and every one of their heads with black hoods and bludgeoned them into disappearance and silenced death without a trickle of blood left for anyone to retrace.

I couldn't help but to imagine that a year later on the May 13th, the nation marched confidently to the Parliament with great pride for unity and understanding imbued in their hearts as one which was portrayed vividly on their P.Ramlee masks, to witness the raze of the historical building in a spectacular explosive fireworks accompanied by the spirit-elevating Overture as a symbol of a new country that rose taller than her dark past which marked as a new resolution and hope for her people.

I can't help but to hope for the best for this country, for her people, for my dear family members and friends that the best would turn out from this coming General Election; that everything that was once promised to her people and by the government, would be fulfilled without hesitation and with utmost obligation that fights to ensure the rights of every citizen; rather than just becoming another nonsensical string of the crow's ugly harks that deceived the trust of the nation over and over again.

I can't help but to hope that this country would not need a masked vigilante and unnecessary fireworks-bombings like my imagination had invoked to save herself from continuing her voyage on this damned path where many crooked politicians lurked around for opportunities that would eventually lead her to her downfall.

I can't help - but only to continue imagining and hoping persistently in my heart.

p/s I am just passing the words. If you have read what Vincent has to say, if you think what he said holds truth and that this country needs just more than your voice and critics, to make it through the hardship she is facing now, and to show that Malaysia Day means much more to you than rather as another Sept 16 - get the Jalur Gemilang at the back of your left hand (it's right hand for the lefties, unless you have some sort of extraordinary skill where you can use your right hand to draw a flag at the back of it), spark some creativity and post the picture up on Facebook, Friendster etc to show your spirit.

Next post would be my greetings from the chilly London - if my last few days here for this year could not accomodate blogging. Till then, peace out people, take care!

Musing of A Young Malaysian

Does singing the national anthem makes you a patriot?

How about reciting the Rukunegara every morning when you wake up?

Or being born here that inevitably registers you a nationality here with a granted MyKad when you are 12 makes you one either?

Or rather is it what you do and feel inside that makes you a Malaysian?

Before I could realise that this coming Sunday our nation is celebrating her 51st independence anniversary, I am reminded multiple times by the surrounding and the people around me of how fortunate I am to be part of this country. You might think this is probably like every very-Malaysian cliche you read in newspapers that you will usually find in the month of August telling you how the food, colours and cultures in Malaysia blend in together to inform you how lucky you are to be Malaysian. But if time is not of hassle to you, please do join me and I tell you from my view of what has a Malaysian become of me. I won't promise you a very hoo-hah Pulitzer-winning story, but however a very sincere and subtle - yet hidden at times - perspective from a young lad who has spent all his life on this soil.

* * *

From the day I stepped away from Ipoh to the day I stepped away from high school, I never remembered loving this country. Neither do I hate it - oh well, maybe sometimes. But funny, I took pride of being a product of national school. Blabbering in Malay, I am happy and not shy to exercise it especially in the mamak slang - cun siott. I also take pride of being very fluent in it (except for when in debate and professional use, and under stress) compared to most of my uni mates, but I do remember how much I hated learning it. Most importantly, I take pride in it not because of the country's education philosophy and policy duhh - but of the people that I hanged out with for the rest of my childhood that shaped me today. With the hills, jungle and being an all-boys premier school, it just makes my days with them much more worthwhile. I even had - have, until today - two pet-sisters who are Muslimahs. I was colourblind then.

Yes - I am still colourblind, but I do see the contrast now with the issues they bring as I continue to count my years. With the newly found ability, I saw how the colours that makes no sense to my colourblind eyes affect our society, education system, our young ones, our economy, our land and our rights with racist remarks and hatred. With this influx of information, I read more and reformed myself, taking a stance to understand this national plague better in order to remedy it. But I was met with disappointments, with each party being immensely revolved around their own interests, I sidelined myself from being poisoned by their thoughts. However, being alone, I drunk myself with depression of my weak comprehension on human and called for the white flag too quickly. I turned into one of them for a moment in doing so.

Soon, I plunged back into my former realisations again, where I involved myself in many things. Say...taking trips to art galleries, participating in community services, catching debates and discussions with friends, noticing every tiny thing and smile on faces, reading the papers, taking interests in the nation's politics - everything, errr....except for my study. My parents are going to kill me, I know, hahahaha - but it is fun knowing how this nation is formed at those seconds I discover something new. Those things can exist before I do, way even before this nation was born. And like a jigsaw puzzle, these missing pieces tell me exactly what I need to know of what went through the minds of people then before and after Malaysia appeared on the world map. They share with me more stories that complicate my mind, but warm my heart more like a plate of nasi lemak topped with rendang chicken and beef serunding.

With a new generation that is very aggresive in speaking their mind, the media and the local arts scene has been flooded with works lately that many did not know are portraying elements of unity. From music, advertisements and poetry to the silver screen, these arts are a very honest and sometimes down-to-earth reflection of what's being like to be in Malaysia. Words that are sown silenced are now loud and clear, breaking the barrier of differences that each Malaysian kept inside thinking they are the odd ones themselves not knowing others are just like them - same.

One very vivid, that is still fresh within me, Malaysian portrayal is Yasmin Ahmad's Sepet. Highly recommended, a film that truly touches the heart of many people like me - I don't know how to explain it here, and you have to watch it for yourself. Remember those Petronas advertisements about Merdeka? Especially the one by Yasmin Ahmad too: Percintaan Tan Hong Ming (Tan Hong Ming's Love; the video below). That young lil' boy reminds me of myself so much!!! Yeah, please do tap into the video posted below, another great work of Malaysian artistes that have the same vision as me of walking towards an undivided Malaysia.

Earlier on, I set foot to Penang again after so many years. Rather than going to Komtar where I stood with trembling legs when I was kid then in one of the highest floors, I managed to place myself in various parts of the island where I witnessed everything from the hills and seas to the people and culture that mixes with contemporary lifestyle and surviving traditions - plus with a little dose of their own politics and isolated history unlike the mainland's. Ok, I confess openly, I fell in love with the island after with a renewed perspective of this nation. This small island, which looks too small to offer big surprises, is actually what Malaysia should modelled after. Oh puh-leaze Penangites, I know I am talking about your homestate, but please don't kembang. In the case you people do, I hope you guys meletup menjadi karipap XD.

I couldn't explain why as I have not completely found what's the Midas touch behind this piece of land separated by seawater, and even if I want to, it would be very lengthy. Maybe next time, until I've learnt of this island much more.

And in UIAM (International Islamic University Malaysia), where I attended on behalf of the campus for a convention, my Muslim and Muslimah friends taught me so much. They opened my eyes wider (not that from colourblind eyes to eyes that can shoot optical blast like X-Men's Cyclops) and they can be really good companions that I can learn from and be honest with. A sight of Malaysia that most Malaysians missed despite being located in a Muslim-dominant varsity,it is the perfect model to debunk stereotypical myths that all Muslims are terrorists and stuff after the incident of 9/11 which is still lively in my mind. We never hide our racial weakness, nor we are not seeking any comparisons of superiority that traces back to our roots and history as it does not matter now as we are one standing on the same ground with the same dilemmas. We always see the other parties and races as the problem when something unwanted arises, and are too quick point our fingers at them, but most of the times, we do not see ourselves as the problem itself too - nor being part of a solution to it.

During my first month in overseas for a working placement end of this year, I foresee that I will miss this place a lot. Ironically, I used to despise this country and dreaming of staying overseas. Now I know why my friends who are back from overseas and those bound to leave for overseas for study, and my aunt in UK when retired, will come back to this place where they belong. Some say it is the governance that screws this country up leaving certain parties marginalised, while others claimed the foolishness of our forefathers signing the social contract. Certain who are not wrong as well say it is all about being human beings.

It will be us the young ones who will lead this country at the end of the day. We are the ones who will pioneer a change as we see fit as how things will change. Who knows that this Indian kid that I know, struggling to support her family by selling nasi lemak while bringing her little brother along to babysit, whose tongue is good at bargaining but never fails to be polite with a 'terima kasih' zipping the deal, will be the prime minister one day. Our politicians, their words, our stubborn elders together with the nation's past can only be like shadows trailing behind us and our future ones. Only our hands will be able to preserve what we love best of this country.

A united Malaysia, my faith is renewed knowing that are more people who are indifferent than I am that I have yet to meet. A new home for me, and a Malaysian I am and tell you of it.

Malaysian Artistes for Unity - Here In My Home